A Cheap Imitation of the Real Thing
I go back to my dorm, take a quick shower, do my hair up, and am thinking about getting dressed when my roommate, Morgan, comes in and sits on her bed. She has only unpacked her bedding. And I’m kinda surprised by this because she does seem like one of those annoying overachiever types. (Was Morgan her name in the final version? I can’t even remember.)
I mean I’m fine with being an achiever, she just seems like she tries too hard. But I figure I’ll make the best of it and be nice to her.
“So, have you figured out what you are going to wear to dinner and the mixer?” I ask her.
She stares at my gorgeous ocean poster and says, “I hate the water.”
“You hate the water? Did you like almost drown or get bitten by a shark? Everyone loves the water.”
“No, I just prefer the electricity of a big city.”
And the anonymity, I would think, as well. But I don’t say that. “Well, yeah, but some cities, like Miami have both.”
She sighs at me. She doesn’t like to be wrong. “I also don’t think I can live with Malibu Barbie.”
And I was like, “How did you know I’m from Malibu? I don’t remember telling you that.”
And I realize that is the second time in two days I have had a quote from Legally Blonde thrown at me.
“It was kinda a slam. Gee, you’re dumb. So I’m moving in with a girl I’m going to be in band with. She isn’t happy with her roommate either. So her roommate is going to move in with you.”
“Uh, no. They said we can’t switch roommates. You can’t just ditch me!”
I’m getting ditched by a four eyed band geek?! Oh my second day? How totally uncool am I?
“I talked to the student advisor about it, and she said we can switch if all four of us agree. And since when are you a rule follower anyway? You came in a half hour after curfew!”
“I was in the dorm before curfew, but there were a few girls still up, so we were talking a little. Getting to know one another. You should try it.”
She ignores my snarky comment. “So I’ll introduce you to your new roommate tonight. She tried out for the dance team too, so you’ll probably get along just fine.”
And I’m thinking well, maybe she will be better. And all of a sudden, I’m excited to meet her.
Morgan, I’m kinda impressed that she had the balls and the resourcefulness to get all this figured out. I’m thinking maybe I should try to be friends with her, but then I realize she’s already biased against me. Against the beach, against my tan, against my late nights, and I don’t really think I want to take the time to convince her I am anything more than that. Besides, I have to finish getting dressed, do my makeup perfectly, and go stalk the God of all Hotties.
And Dallas. And maybe even that hot guy Peyton is always hanging out with. He is freaking gorgeous. (She’s already crushing a little on Dawson here.) I need to find out if that’s her boyfriend because I haven’t seen them like kiss or hold hands or anything, maybe they are just bffs. I hope.
While I’m getting ready, I get a text from Riley, well he put his number in my phone and the name he put was Sex God. I haven’t had time to change it.
Sex God: </3
Me: Whats that for?
Sex God: You’re supposed to make out with me, not Dallas
Me: whoops 🙂 (Only Keatyn could get away with this line.)
Sex God: I’m outside your dorm, walk you to dinner?
Me: I’m not quite ready.
Sex God: Then I’m coming up.
Me: Cool. 16A
There’s a knock at my door, and I open it.
Riley is standing there. He looks really good. He’s wearing a deep blue dress shirt with black pants and shiny Italian loafers. I’m talking very expensive, Tommy has three pairs and bitched about the price the whole time he was buying them, loafers. His dark hair is slicked back instead of down and shaggy, and he reminds me a bit of Nate, from Gossip Girl. He also looks much older this way, and damn, if I don’t like it.
My makeup is done, but I’m still wearing just my really short, little silk pink robe with just my bra and panties underneath.
He grabs my waist with his huge hands and says, “Damn. You look sexy. This what you’re wearing tonight?”
I’m close to him. He smells amazing.
“I don’t think this is probably appropriate.”
“Maybe we should skip dinner, I wanna take this off you.” He starts to reach for the robe’s tie.
“You’re very subtle, huh?”
His dark eyes glisten. “I find the direct approach to be most effective.”
“It probably is, but it’s not very romantic.”
“I’m not really looking for romance.”
“And I’m not really looking for sex.”
He lets go of me, and I take a few steps over to in front of my mirror. I finish running some straightening balm across my hair and then pull my bangs back into a pouf. I add some big hoops, and I like the way I look. I have kinda a seventies vibe, which will be perfect with my dress for tonight.
Riley sits on Morgan’s bed and stares at the ocean on my wall. “That’s gorgeous. I love the ocean.”
“Yeah, me too. Do you surf?”
“Some. We have a house in the Hamptons, so I spend most of my summers there.”
“I love the beach. In case you can’t tell. That’s actually me out there surfing.”
“Really?” he gets up and walks closer to my wall. “And the guy,” he says, pointing at Brooklyn, “that your amazing boyfriend?”
“That’s Brooklyn, yeah.”
“So if he’s so amazing why were you making out with Dallas last night?”
“Well, we have an understanding, I guess. Maybe, I don’t know. Basically, he told me I should experience all my new school has to offer and that includes boys.”
“So he broke up with you? You don’t have a boyfriend? You lied?”
“Um, no, I just, he still is my boyfriend, we’re just taking a break. I don’t know what we’re doing, really. It’s sorta confusing. I miss him, but I know he’s right.”
“Good. Glad we got that cleared up.”
He walks up behind me. I’m still standing looking in the mirror. Trying to decide if I should add more eyeliner.
He leans his head down and starts kissing my shoulder. Then he kisses up the side of my neck. (Um, yeah. In this version, she and Riley kiss. And she even thinks about having sex with him. Right now. Hot, yes. But no, Keatyn. Just say no.)
And I’m not sure why, but I don’t stop him.
Then he pulls his lips off my neck, glances at me in the mirror, looks down at my shoulder, grins, and slides the robe off my shoulder.
And I know I should stop him. I really should.
He turns me around to face him. And then he leans in and kisses me.
He has the softest lips. Ever. Seriously. Which is really a shock because he is big and kind of rugged looking. And he also kisses very well.
Very, very well.
Different than Dallas, more um, impatient. I think Dallas would have been happy just kissing me for days, but Riley, I’m pretty sure, has other things on his mind.
I’m pretty sure Brooklyn kissed me like this just the other night, like right before we finally did. These are he wants me now kind of kisses.
He grabs my waist and literally picks me up off the floor, takes a few steps, and lays me on the bed while still kissing me.
How is a freshman in high school so freaking strong?
And somehow in that move, he also managed to untie my robe. (Go, Riley! I have such mixed emotions about this scene I went back and forth on. To do Riley, or not to do Riley? That is the question. Personally, I wanted to, but it wasn’t right for Keatyn. Sorry.)
But then his hand starts rubbing down the top of my thigh, and I realize I can’t do this.
Not with him anyways.
At least not now.
I barely know him!
“Uh, I don’t think this is a good idea.”
He murmurs through my hair, “Oh, I think it’s a very good idea.”
“I can’t, okay. I barely know you. And we need to get to dinner.”
He gives me another deep kiss.
“Go to the dance with me. Be my date tomorrow night.”
“I was under the impression the dance was supposed to be a way to like meet people, dance with different people, get to know them. There’s a lot of girls here you’ve never met. Surely, you want to meet them and dance with them?”
“I could care less. I only want to dance with you. And then sneak you back to my dorm room.”
“I think you’re moving wayyyy too fast.”
“Fine. You’ll dance with me though?”
“Yeah. Let me up.”
He still has me pinned underneath him. And I, uh, can feel that he likes it.
“I don’t know if I should believe you.” He gives me a grin. “What if someone else asks you to the dance?”
“Someone else already did, and I said no. And he’s like the God of all Hotties.”
Shit. I shouldn’t have said that.
“The God of all Hotties? Who is that?”
“Uh, never mind. Forget I said that.”
He kisses me again and run his hand back up my thigh, basically threatening me in a very sexy way, “Tell me, or I will be forced to keep kissing you. And possible torture you with my tongue. I need to know who my competition is.”
“I don’t remember his name. He’s that goalie guy.” I say, and then I grab the back of his head, pull him into a long kiss. I am also running my fingers through his hair roughly.
I know that I am totally sending him mixed messages. (And he loves it!)
“Ummm, you kiss good. I like when you kiss me.”
“Well, if you want me to ever kiss you again, I suggest you let me up, tell me if what I’m going to wear looks good or not, and then walk me to dinner.”
“I getta watch you get dressed?”
“Damn. Why not?” He leans up slightly, gets an eyeful of my leopard print bra. “I’ve already seen them.” But he does as he is told, gets up, grabs my hand, and pulls me up off the bed in one easy, effortless motion.
It’s really kinda hot.
But then I realize he also managed to pull my robe off my shoulders in the process, well sort of. I quick pull it back up onto my shoulders. He is way too smooth.
“So you might wanna, uh, brush the back of your hair a little,” he laughs.
I run into my closet and grab my dress, walk back out, holding it in front of me and say, “So, what do you think? Oh wait, let me grab my wedges, so you know, you get the full effect.” I dig down in the bottom of my suitcase and grab my wedges, slide them on my feet. Then I hold the dress in front of me. “Okay. So? You think this will be okay? Be like appropriate for tonight?”
“What I think is that you better put that dress on really fast or we’re not going to make dinner.”
His eyes are gliding up and down my body. I run back in the closet, slip the dress on, then let him zip it up. He kisses my shoulder.
I twirl around, showing off the dress. It’s a dark coral spaghetti strap dress. It has delicate embroidery on it that gives it that sorta 70’s boho look, but it fits me well, glides over my curves. It’s sexy, but in a subtle way.
“I think I’ll have the prettiest girl there on my arm. You look amazing, really, the dress is like the perfect mix of sweet and sexy.” He pulls me into another kiss. “Come on. We better go, before you get me all hot again.”
And I’m trying not to think about how he might torture me with my tongue, but that is exactly what’s on my mind as I walk into the dining hall on Riley’s arm.
I can’t say I mind it. Even though he is obviously looking for sex, you can’t help but like his honesty about it. I would much prefer to know where I stand than play games with some player.
So even though he is the God of all Hotties, Aiden is probably out of the running.
I think Dallas is adorable, but let’s face it, I have only met freshmen boys and Aiden, who is a sophomore. There have been some very cute older boys roaming about, so I don’t want to, like you know, pick someone yet.
And really, I’m not sure if I will pick anyone at all. I mean, maybe for some fun, but definitely not a relationship.
I mean, I love Brooklyn, right? (Oh, Keatyn….)
Riley and I go through the buffet, and then he sits us at the end of a table all by ourselves. Which is kinda weird, it’s like he’s sending a message, she’s here with me, we need to be alone, which is not the kind of dinner I was thinking about. It makes it look like we are on a date. And we’re not.
But then the gorgeous dark haired boy, who hangs with Peyton, walks over with a couple other guys. They all set their trays down next to us. Gorgeous says, “Bro,” and slaps Riley on the back. Both Gorgeous and Riley have their hair slicked back in the same way, and I realize I am looking at an older version of Riley.
Riley is going to get even hotter.
Gorgeous throws his arm around my shoulder and says, “Riley is just a cheap imitation of the real thing. I’m Dawson.”
Riley’s face drops a little.
Dawson is super cute, but the way he just slammed his brother in front of the girl he walked in with, well, it’s a dick move, and the zen in me thinks karma is a bitch. So I decide to give him a little payback for his comment.
I remove his arm from my shoulder, like its a piece of trash, turn to face him and say, “Funny, he felt pretty real in my dorm room a few minutes ago.” (I love how she stands ups up for Riley here, even though it is kinda bitchy.)
The other boys at the table are like, “OOHHHH” and “Way to go, Riles!”
And Riley’s face lights back up again.
“You guys are lame,” Dawson tells us. Then he sees Peyton setting down her tray, and says, “I’m gonna go sit with Peyton. Enjoy romper room over here.”
God, he’s a jerk.
I put my hand on top of his, so he can’t go just yet, and decide to really stick it to him. “I heard Peyton gushing all about her college boyfriend. That must really suck for you.” (Peyton? What? Can you imagine how different the story would have been? But after writing Stalk Me and what Keatyn goes through with Vanessa and RiAnne, it was so awesome to have Peyton go through the same thing. It added an incredible dichotomy to the story, and I loved having Keatyn know that it was going to end badly. Hello, up on the stage at the end of Hate Me? Another interesting tidbit, was that I originally thought Whitney would find out who Keatyn really was and out her—not do what she did to Peyton. It was so much more delicious to have her go after Peyton and have Keatyn out herself in order to protect her friend. It showed so much Keatyn growth in that one moment.)
His eyes get the same hurt look as Riley’s had a few moments ago. And he walks away.
One of the boys that is sitting there says, “Damn, girl, you’re ruthless.”
“He was mean to Riley.”
“Naw. They’re brothers, they always joke like that, slamming each other in front of hot girls. I’m Jake, by the way.” He reaches his hand across the table and shakes mine.
“And I’m Bryce,” says a very cute boy with blonde hair and adorable freckles. He is cute, but way too short for me. “How did you know about Peyton and Dawes anyway?”
“I didn’t really, just a good guess. I saw how he was looking at her at the cave last night and then just now. She’s my student leader. Actually talked me into trying out for the dance team. Which I was not at all planning to do. And she was gushing a bit about this college boy. So I just,” I turn to Riley. “I’m sorry, that wasn’t very nice of me, I’ll apologize to your brother.”
Riley laughs, “Do what you want, but that was AWESOME! You and I are gonna be great friends.”
Then the muscular, black boy speaks. This boy is a hottie, looks like a bit like Drake, but is taller and has sexier muscles. “I’m Tyrese. What up? So last night you were making out with that Dallas dude and now your doing shit in the dorm with Riley? Wanna come up to my room later?” He sexily winks at me.
Riley says sweetly, “We weren’t doing stuff in her dorm room. I walked with her to dinner. She was just saying that to make Dawes mad.”
I turn and look at Riley. Smile with my eyes. Because oh my gosh, the player just totally stood up for my reputation. He’s so sweet.
“So you gonna make the dance team?” Jake asks me.
“I don’t know. Probably not. I mean there were eighteen girls trying out for three spots. I felt like I did pretty good, but dance isn’t really my thing.”
“What is your thing?”
“Uh, well, I’m pretty good at soccer, I’m hoping to make at least JV.”
“I heard you rocked at soccer tryouts,” Tyrese says, then winks again. “And I also witnessed your scoring on Aiden wearing cowboy boots and a dress.” He laughs. “We gave him all sorts of shit about that today at football practice.”
“You shouldn’t have done that. I think I shocked him, he just wasn’t prepared for me to actually kick it.”
“You don’t even know, do you?”
“Aiden is only a sophomore, but he’s one of the best goalies around. He was our starter last year on Varsity, and we won state. The dude already has scholarship offers about anywhere he wants to go. I also heard him talking about you, girly. I think he’s in love.” (In this version, Aiden is a year older than Keatyn.)
I want to talk more about this subject. Cuz are we talking love or lust? And just how many other girls is he in love with?
I’m dyinggggg to know what he said, and I’m trying to think of what I can say to subtly get him to TELL ME MORE!
But Riley quickly changes the subject. “So where’s the party tonight, boys?”
Bryce shifts his eyes around, making sure no one is around, and says, “Keatyn, if there’s one thing your new friend can do, it’s party. He can drink Dawes under the table, and that’s saying something.” He turns to Riley and whispers, “Heritage 22C and 32C is the backup plan. Just you two, ‘k?”
Riley nods his head.
The boys take their trays and head out to the mixer.
Riley grins at me. “Told ya. I have this place wired.”
“Yeah, you did,” I grin back. “And thanks for what you said. I mean, that was really cool of you.”
“And that surprises you?”
“Yeah actually, it kinda did. I sorta thought you would be the kinda guy that would be bragging about it.”
“Well normally, I am that kinda guy, but I guess with you I’m not. I feel this strange need to protect you.”
I bat my eyes at him. “I like that.”
“Ready to go to this lame ass mixer thing?”
I’ve Died and Gone to Hottie Heaven
We walk across next door to where the mixer is being held. We get to the auditorium and see a note on the door that reads, Mixer?? How Lame!!!! Surprise Freshman!! Come to the carnival at the soccer fields.
“Did you know about this?” I ask Mr. Know It All.
“Actually, yeah, I did. But it’s like a surprise for the Freshman class every year, and I wanted you to be surprised.” Theres no one in the hall, so I grab him and pull him to my lips.
I’ve been wanting to kiss him since he stood up for me.
“Damn. You seriously kiss good.”
“So do you. Come on, let’s go have some fun.”
He grabs my hand and drags me as fast as my wedges will allow down to the soccer fields, which have been turned into a full out carnival. There’s all sorts of food booths and games, a ferris wheel, and even a dunking tank where you get to dunk the teachers.
Can I say, I love it here.
A Ferris wheel. Not as big as my favorite one on Venice beach, but still.
“Hey, there’s Dallas and Carson.”
We head over to them. Dallas has a huge blob of pink cotton candy on a stick.
“Cotton candy is my favorite!” I shrill, sounding unexpectedly girly.
Dallas pulls some cotton candy off the stick and puts it up to my mouth. So I open it, and he shoves the fluff all in at once.
I’m laughing with pink fluff hanging out of my mouth. I bite off a piece and put the other half in my hand. Riley grabs my hand and puts it up to his mouth.
“I’m not sharing.” I tease.
Riley puts my fingers into his mouth and sucks the candy off them. (I can so picture this . . . and want it for myself. I have a mad crush on Riley.)
It sorta takes my breath away.
Standing there, in front of everyone. Doing something so simple as feeding him cotton candy, but at the same time, it feels so overtly sexual, it makes me blush. Especially the way he is gazing me, as he is sucking the melted candy off my fingers.
I actually have to turn and look away.
And who chooses this exact moment to be in my line of vision? Who is standing there watching Riley suck cotton off each one of my fingers?
The God of all Hotties himself.
I give him a save me look.
And I’m not sure why. I don’t really want to be saved from Riley. He is totally turning me on. But I think even though I am not at all interested in the god, I, for some reason, don’t want him to think I’m here with Riley, or that I like what Riley is doing to me. Even though I do.
Really freaking do.
Aiden says, “Hey, Boots, come here. My sister was just looking for you.”
Dallas says, “Boobs?”
“No. He calls me Boots cuz of the boots the other day.”
“Oh, I gotcha.”
Aiden is not very patient when he says, “Come on.”
I look at Riley, with a I guess I have to go with him look, and take off with Aiden.
“What does your sister want?”
Aiden smiles. “Nothing. I lied. It was either that or kick the crap out of that Riley dude for sucking on your fingers.”
I scoff at him. “Why would you do that? He was just stealing my cotton candy.”
“Looked like a little more than that to me. And I heard you were making out with Dallas last night after I left.”
“We were high,” I tell him. “It was just a little friendly kissing.”
“I don’t like it.”
“I just don’t.”
“Uh, okay. So now what?”
“You look amazing. I like your hair like that.”
“Uh, thanks,” I mutter out.
I swear, I’m a very literate and well spoken young lady. I can talk to anyone. Heads of state, blockbuster movie stars, rock stars, but this boy, he has me like tongue tied. And then I stare at his mouth, and think I’d like to know more about his tongue. (We all do! And, oh, how long did we have to wait for that damn tongue—like four books?)
Okay. That’s it.
I need a time out.
Like my little sisters get.
Go sit in a corner by myself.
What? 36 hours ago, I had sex with Brooklyn and an amazing night. I felt so amazingly in love with him. Less than a day later, I made out with Dallas, and then today, I made out with Riley. And now, I am standing here thinking all I want to do is kiss the hottie god.
What’s wrong with me?
I think I’m on boy overload.
Are there not any girls here?
I need to find some.
I’m not attracted to girls.
“So did the four leaf clover bring you luck?” he asks me.
“I don’t know yet. I think we find out sometime tonight who made it. And you know, the odds aren’t good, and I like tried out on a whim. I’m sure I didn’t make it.”
“My sister said you did very well. You also did very well at soccer tryouts, kicked ass, really. You’ll definitely make Varsity.”
“Yeah, I do. Hey,” he gets an adorable little boy grin, “wanna go ride the ferris wheel?”
“I’d love to.”
And then he takes my hand to lead me over to it.
And once again.
Just his touching my hand makes me feel slightly dizzy.
No way I can kiss this boy, I would probably pass out.
And that would probably not be a good thing.
I’m thinking so hard, I barely realize we are now sitting on the Ferris wheel together. He is sitting close to me, and he casually puts his arm around my shoulder.
I can’t help it.
My body leans in to him. And I rest my head on his shoulder.
I feel like I’ve died and gone to hottie heaven.
Please, God, or Hottie Gods, whoever, don’t let this ride end.
Pretty soon we are stuck at the very top of the Ferris wheel, looking at the pretty lights and he says, “Boots.”
I raise my head up, and that’s when he kisses me.
A slow, perfect, time stood still, fireworks in front of my eyes, kind of kiss.
And it was just a little kiss. No open mouths, no tongues, just a kiss.
A little teeny kiss.
I’m in love him.
Can you fall in love instantly? (Yes, you can, Keatyn. You totally just did. Although, technically, it probably happened on the soccer field.)
Mom says she fell instantly in love with Tommy. They met on a set when they did a movie together, and she says the second he shook her hand, she knew. And four months later, she was pregnant with the triplets.
The kiss has stopped, but I am stupidly still sitting there with my eyes closed.
I realize this and open them.
“That was amazing,” he tells me.
I can’t form a sentence, so I nod breathlessly.
He kisses me again.
And I don’t change my mind with the second kiss.
But, I can not.
CAN NOT fall in love with a guy that is gonna play me. A guy that thinks he’s in love with every girl he dates, but breaks up with them quickly because he just knows she’s not the one.
After a kiss like that. He should know I’m the one.
He should be down on his knees begging me to marry him and have his hottie babies. (One of my favorite lines. Wouldn’t it be easy if boys would just admit their undying devotion right away? Except that would turn us off. LOL)
There shouldn’t be anything to think about.
But I’m sure it was a one sided thing. Although he said it was amazing.
Shit. He stopped kissing me again, and now he’s saying something to me.
“It’s our turn to get off next.”
When did the ferris wheel even move?
I seriously did not feel it move.
We step off the ferris wheel, and I feel the extreme urge to run away from him as fast as I possibly can. The predator, Dawson, or even Tyrese, the winker, seem safe compared to Aiden.
He must really be the God of all Hotties.
Because I’m pretty sure he just used some special powers on me. The make her lose track of all time power, the kiss her and fill her mind with cotton candy power.
“Uh, um, I gotta get back to my, um, friends,” I stutter out.
The make her lose the ability to form a complete sentence power.
“Oh, no you don’t. My sister really is looking for you. I was supposed to find you and bring you back to the stage.”
It’s a blinding white teeth smile.
A push me over the edge of the love cliff smile.
And before I can say a word in protest, he’s got my hand and is dragging me through the carnival.
Note to self.
Do not stare directly at his smile. It holds special powers.
Also. Do not kiss him. His mouth definitely is the source of his power.
Stay far away from it.
Far, far away.
But far, far away was the wrong thing to think, as my mind is now thinking of fairytales and true love’s kiss.
Pretty soon, I’m standing in front of his sister. She screams when she sees us. “Keatyn, I have been looking EVERYWHERE for you! Where has my brother been hiding you?” (You’ll notice that most of the Aiden scenes to this point are the same as the published version. I think you can tell that he was the one from their very first interaction. And so can both of them. But it wouldn’t be very much fun had they gotten together right away. And what they went through together, how they build their foundation of love, made them so much better as a couple. But, oh, it was torturous!)
“We were, uh…..”
Shit where were we?? I have seriously lost my freaking mind. And I may have to kiss him again to get it back.
It’s worth a shot, maybe.
“I made her go on the ferris wheel with me first,” Aiden says, saving me.
“Bad boy,” she says and gives him a playful swat.
“Well anyways, CONGRATS!!!” she yells. Then a whole group of girls are surrounding me, screaming, bouncing up and down, and putting red and yellow boas around my neck, a red feathered crown or something in my hair. And then a banner across my chest, like I’ve just won Miss American. I look down at it and it says, Dance Team in gold glittery letters. “YOU MADE IT!!!” Then she pulls me in and whispers in my ear, “You also made Varsity Soccer, but you didn’t hear that from me.”
I am really excited about that.
And I am now in a whirlwind of Congrats and getting introduced to this bunch of screaming girls, getting pictures taken with them. Then we all get up on stage, the current dance team and the three of us that made it, all decked out ridiculously, and do the dance we learned today at tryouts. Peyton throws me pompoms, and I smile and dance, while thinking about the craziness of today.
All I have to say is, boarding school is no day at the beach.
It’s way more exciting.
When I come off the stage, there is Dawson. Staring at me.
Uh, make that GLARING at me. (I apparently hadn’t yet learned the subtle art of italics.)
I walk straight up to him and say sincerely, “Hey, I’m really sorry about what I said earlier. It was kinda mean of me.”
“You were sticking up for my brother because of what I said about him being the imitation, right?”
“Yeah, he looked sad when you said it, and I just reacted. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it. It was kinda mean, if you don’t know us, but he and I joke about stuff like that all the time. Plus he’s my little bro. I have to give him shit.”
He lowers his voice and says, “And you’re right about Peyton. I do like her. Speaking of that, the guys told me Riley said you didn’t really do anything in your dorm room.”
“Uh, well, he kinda lied about that. We did kiss.”
“So you kissed Dallas last night, kissed my brother today, and I just saw you kissing Aiden on the ferris wheel. Busy girl.”
“When you say it like that, it makes it sound slutty. I’m really not slutty.”
“Well, all I know is this. My brother has NEVER not told us about a girl he’s been with. He usually brags his ass off trying to impress us. The fact that he lied to the guys about you, tells me he might actually like you. And congrats on dance team. It’s a big honor. All the hottest girls are on dance team. You’ll fit in well.”
“Um, okay and thanks.”
Is it bad that I wanna say what my mom says some nights? I just want an Ambien and my pillow.
I’m so tired and so on stimulatory overload.
But then Aiden saunters up to me, gives me a big hug, which nearly stops my heart from beating, and says, “Congrats. You looked really surprised. I pretty much told you that you made it on the ferris wheel.”
“The ferris wheel is sorta a blur.” I say without thinking.
“A good blur, I hope. Hey, there’s all your friends, worshipers, whatever. I think they all want to congratulate you.” He stops and kisses my hand.
You heard that right.
He kissed my hand. Like freaking Prince Charming.
Then he says, “Don’t forget, you owe me a dance or two tomorrow.”
“I won’t,” I say breathlessly.
And then poof, he disappears into thin air.
And I wonder for a minute if he was actually real.
Can anyone else see this demigod?
Oh yeah, Dawson saw me kiss him, so yes. He must be real.
Dallas, Riley, and the rest of the boys all are giving me hugs and congrats and pats on the back.
Dallas says, “You looked great up there. You hungry?”
And I realize just how hungry I am. I really was too stressed to eat dinner.
“I’m starved! Let’s get something to eat.”
While I’m sitting there eating a freshly grilled Philly cheesesteak and homemade potato chips, Morgan comes trudging up to me, pushing a girl in front of her. The girl is also decked out in feathers.
“Meet your new roommate, Katelyn.” (Obviously, Katie, who had her name shortened to fit her bouncy personality. Also, this is my daughter’s middle name, and the more I got to know Katie, I couldn’t give her that name.)
Katelyn gets a big grin on her face and gives me a hug. “Oh, thank God. You made it too. When they told me it was some girl that tried out, I was so afraid once I found out I made it that she wouldn’t have and would hate me. You cool with this? I sure as hell am.”
“Absolutely,” I tell Morgan. “But I’m almost unpacked, so she moves to my room, right?”
“Yep. Molly and I will get everything moved over to your room tonight. Sorry, it just didn’t work for me.”
“Thats okay, no hard feelings,” I say.
Katelyn is adorable. Perky, bouncy brown hair with expensive reddish blonde highlights, button nose, and a sweet smile.
I introduce her to the boys, and she immediately hits it off with Carson. “You guys want to go on the Ferris wheel?” She bounces a bit when she says this. And her ample boobs shake just a bit. She is really quite peppy, and the boys are enthralled.
“You go. I’m gonna finish eating.”
Dallas says he’s gonna stay with me. Then he sits down and says, “Plus, you already rode the ferris wheel.”
“Uh, yeah, I did. Have you?”
“Yeah, I rode it, but I don’t think I had as much fun as you.”
“I take it you saw Aiden kiss me?”
“Yeah. And I’m okay with it. Last night, I dig you, sure, but last night was just, you know, we got high, we kissed. It was just chill, right?”
He reminds me of Brooklyn even more with that comment.
“Now my friend, Riley, on the other hand, he didn’t look too pleased. In fact, he looked pretty pissed. You kiss him too?”
I purse my lips and look up at the sky, trying to decide what to say. What spin I should put on this. You know, I may need to hire a good publicist to survive school here. Someone to put the proper spin on what I get caught doing. Make it sound like it was okay. What do they say? Any publicity is good publicity.
“Look at me,” Dallas says. “The answer to that question is not in the sky. And don’t lie to me. I hate when people lie to me. And I can tell we’re gonna be friends. Good friends. I’m talking TIGHTTTT,” he laughs. “So just tell me.”
So I spill my guts.
“So all summer, I’ve hung out with Brooklyn. He’s been my best friend for three years, and this summer, we became more. We weren’t officially going out, but he told me he loved me all summer, and we spent the whole summer together, surfing, hanging out, smoking, kissing and stuff. And then my last night home, we spent together. Surfing, drinking champagne, kissing, and then we had sex. It was my first time, and it was amazing. Awkward kinda physically, you know, but he made me feel amazing. And then the next morning, we watched the sun rise, and we did it again. Like twice. And when I left, I was so sad. I felt so in love with him. But he told me I was going to this school to like, I don’t know, find myself and that includes romances. So we aren’t going out or anything. Like I’m officially single. And then I thought you were adorable when I saw you and last night was fun. I mean, I’d go there with you anytime, and I’d kiss you again, for sure. You kiss good. Like sweet.”
“And really, I thought Riley was kind of a conceited jerk, but in a hot way, you know. And then when I kicked that ball in the goal and saw the God of all Hotties.”
“Oh, that’s what I called Aiden before I knew his name. He like does something to me. Like I feel like it was love at first sight. Seriously. But then you guys told me he’s a player, and he pretty much told me the same. But when he talks to me, he is not smooth, like I would think a player would be. He’s nothing like Riley. I mean at least with Riley, you know he’s a player. He doesn’t try to hide it. But then Aiden brought me lunch after soccer, and I thought it was sweet, but then what he said, like it was like this awful pick up line, and I was like whatever. But then right before I went to dance tryouts, he handed me a four leaf clover, like a real one, picked from the ground. And I wondered if he stood there looking for them or what. But I kept telling myself, no players. No players. Then Riley came to walk me to dinner, and I wasn’t quite ready and….”
Dallas says, “Riley already told me what happened. He also told me how you stood up to him in front of his brother. He really liked that you did that.” (I adore how she completely spills her guts to Dallas here.)
“Good. Kissing Riley was like hot. He made me hot, and honestly, if I knew him better, I probably would have let more happen. Because I would know what I was getting into. Like I would know it’s just a thing. Just a hookup. But then Aiden kissed me on the ferris wheel, and I swear, I couldn’t even breathe. Like I have never felt like that before. And this time, he didn’t say anything stupid or cheesy. He was sweet, and I think I’m like falling in love with him. No. I am in love with him. But I know that I can’t be. So I won’t be seeing him anymore. I mean, I will probably see him around, but I’m not gonna fall for him and then have him decide I’m not it. Then dump me like he does all the other girls he goes out with. So basically that’s it. I need to stop kissing boys.”
Dallas laughs at me. “You’re funny. I hear you are supposed to go to a senior party with Riley tonight.”
“Well, if he saw the kiss, he probably won’t want to take me anymore.”
“Oh, no. I think he will. Dawson told him that he heard you two hadn’t really done anything and that if Riley didn’t make a move, he was, tonight. So just know, Dawson is interested. And be careful.”
“I’m not interested in Dawson, he’s got it bad for Peyton. And I like Peyton.”
“Yeah, they used to date. Like all sophomore year and most of last year, I guess. But Dawson cheated on her, well got drunk, and this girl that always liked him pretty much attacked him, and he didn’t say no. And she found out, and I guess they are friends, but she won’t give him another chance.”
“Damn, Dallas. You’re good for all the gossip.”
“He’s not the only one that’s got this place wired,” Dallas says with an easy grin.
“Do you think I can take off this stupid feather crown now?”
“No, you better not. Oh, here comes Tyrese.”
Tyrese sits down with us, resting his muscular arms on the table, “So congrats, dance team is cool. You getta come out and shake that ass for the football team.”
I scrunch my nose up cuz shaking my ass for the football team wasn’t exactly why I tried out. Actually, I’m still not sure why I tried out.
He lowers his voice. “So the party tonight, moved to plan B. You understand?”
“You know how to get in and out of the dorm without getting into trouble?”
Shit, the party must be like after curfew.
“What floor you on?”
“Uh, first. 16A.” (If you notice teeny details, do you know what her room number was in the books? It was 6B. I changed the location of it because Garrett actually chose her room with escape to the boy’s dorm in mind. I think I would have personally pretended to be in distress occasionally.)
“Well aren’t you just the lucky girl?” Okay, so all the outside doors have alarms on them, and I’m sure they told you the whole place is wired, right?”
“Yeah, they did tell us that. They also told us about all the trouble we’d get into if we got caught outside the dorm after curfew.”
“You won’t get caught if you do it right, okay?”
“The biggest problem will probably be your roommate. I heard you have some girl that goes to bed at 9:30. Would she tell on you?”
“She would have, yes, but I have a new roommate. We switched. Now I’m roommates with a girl who also just made the dance team. She’s the really cute petite one.”
“With the huge boobs?”
“Dayummm, you can just bring her along with you then. Introduce her to Tyrese.”
“Okay, she seems fun, so I’m sure I can talk her into it.”
“Solid. Okay, so what they didn’t tell you is that the doors are wired, but the window are not. All you have to do is report for curfew, then about an hour after that, sneak out your window. Check your window, make sure you can get in and out of it. Wait, did you say 16A? Damn girl, that window has got WD40 all up and down the sides of it. It glides like a dream. Effortlessly and quietly. Little honey of mine, graduated last year, that was her room.”
Dallas and I laugh.
“So curfew is at 12 tonight. Be there at one.”
“Wait. How do we get in?”
“Oh shit. I almost forgot. Go to the side of the dorms facing the woods. Walk that way, so no one sees you. Then the second window from your dorm will be open, just climb in and head up to the party. If you have any trouble, text me. Here, give me your phone.”
He grabs my phone, puts in Tyresebaby and his number, winks at me and leaves.
“You gotta take me to one of these parties,” Dallas tells me.
“Let’s wait until I’m actually invited myself, and then you’re in. And before the others get back,” I say, as I see them walking toward me. “Anytime you wanna go back to the cave, you text me.”
“We gonna smoke and kiss some more?”
Shit, I can’t believe I just said that.
But I want to, so, oh well.
He’s Kissing My Soul
Katelyn, you can call me Katie, is excited to go to the party with me. She’s been chattering nervously about it for the last hour, while we unpacked all of our clothes and put them away. We checked our window, and as expected, it did glide very easily. She wanted to leave at 12:55, so we would be there right at one, when the party supposedly starts. But no way was I going to look like an overeager B list actor trying to get into an A list party. I told her we weren’t leaving til 1:15.
At 1:15, she can’t wait any longer. She’s had 2 redbulls and is bursting at the seams. I’m still feeling pacific time and so it feels like 10:15 to me. No big deal. So far. (Love Katie’s bubbly personality. She is so going to be such a fun match for Knox in the Hollywood Love series.)
Katelyn climbs out the window, quite gracefully. I pretty much fell out of the window and into the bushes.
“How did you do that?” I ask her, as I’m picking leaves off my shorts. We had a big dilemma about what to wear tonight. She wanted to be all decked out. I thought maybe we should look more casual. Pajama party casual. We discussed it for about an hour. Killed some time at least.
“Get out the window without falling?” she whispers. “I snuck out my window at home all summer to see my boyfriend.”
“And what exactly were you doing with your boyfriend in the middle of the night?”
She smiles and blushes, “Well, you know. Mostly we just made out a lot, but towards the end of the summer, we started having sex. Well, we did it a few times anyways. I really didn’t care for it. But we were both virgins, so I wasn’t really expecting much.”
“Well when you do it again, hopefully it will be with someone more experienced. I liked it. A lot.”
“Like tonight? Do you think that stuff goes on at this party? I really have no idea what to expect.”
“I would guess like any party. Some weed, probably. Some alcohol, for sure.”
“I can’t get drunk. I’m not much of a drinker, and I’ve never smoked before.”
“Only have two drinks then. I heard them talking about if a young girl gets all drunk and stupid and loud, they like don’t get invited back.”
“We want invited back. They’re seniors!”
“Shhh! Exactly. Okay, now we need to be quiet.” I say, as we get closer to one of the dorms. I don’t want to wake anyone up.
We sneak quietly over to the next dorm and find window number two open as planned. We slide in and go up to the plan B room.
Isn’t Plan B like the morning after pill?
Yikes. Hope that isn’t indicative of how the night will go.
We get to the door. It’s wide open and there’s about twenty people crammed into the room. Well, make that twenty-two now.
Tyrese is standing by the door. He says, “Keatyn baby, who’s your friend?” I introduce him to Katelyn, I mean, Katie, and leave them to talk. If I have learned one thing from my mom, it’s how to work a party. Never stay up front. The good stuff is always in the back. And always make a full sweep of the room before you stop to chat.
I’m specifically looking for something to drink and for Riley. Instead, I get to the back of the room, find an entire keg of beer, with Dawson expertly pumping it.
He sees me, says, “Damn. I didn’t know this was a pajama party. I like seeing what you wear to bed. Want me to take off my clothes, show you what I wear?”
I’m wearing a pair of hot pink Juicy Couture sleep shorts and a little white tank top. And I’m kinda bad, but I’m still wearing the leopard bra underneath. (Dawson, Keatie, and the story of the leopard bra.)
I get close to him, grab the beer out of his hand, take a big drink, and flirt, “I don’t wear pajamas to bed either.”
And then I take a couple big drinks.
“You really shouldn’t flirt with me. I told my brother that if he didn’t get busy with you, I would.”
“Maybe I don’t wanna get busy with you.”
“Oh yeah, you do. You just won’t admit it yet.”
“Where is your brother anyway?”
“Hasn’t shown up. Loser probably fell asleep and is busy having some little boy wet dream about you.” He grabs my waist, much like the way his brother did earlier, and pulls me in toward him. “How bout I show you?”
I take a long, slow drink of beer. Trying to cool him down. But it doesn’t work because he is peeking down my tank top, eyeing my leopard bra. And yeah, you know who, chooses this exact moment to wander up to the keg.
In the flesh.
“Stop that!” I tell Dawson, smacking his hand away.
He releases me from his grip and says, “What’s up, Aiden?”
Aiden scowls at him and says, “Prime example why my sister will never take you back. You should be ashamed of yourself.” Then he turns to me and demands, “Come with me.” (Alpha male in the making. Hello, candy underwear scene?)
He pulls me over to a futon and pulls me down on it with him. Not down on him, like I had sorta hoped. Instead, we are sitting side by side on the futon. On the other end of it is a couple furiously making out.
“What are you doing at this party? They never invite freshman.”
“I was invited. Dawson invited me and Riley, and then Tyrese told me to bring my roommate.”
“I don’t think Riley is even here.”
“I know. I haven’t seen him yet.”
“So, you like beer?”
“Yeah, its fine. Not my favorite, but it’s okay.”
“So what’s your favorite? I’ll see I have it next time.”
“You’ll have it? You act like this is your party.”
“Well, that’s because it is. My room. My party.”
“Well big shot, if that’s the case, then what do you have besides beer?”
“You do drugs?”
“No! Do you?”
“Naw, I’m not into that shit. I just smoke some.”
“Yeah, me too.”
Then he grins. “Tell you what. Come with me across the hall to Bryce’s room. That’s where we keep the good stuff. I’ll make you a drink.”
He leads me out the party and across the hall. Opens the door to an empty dorm room and turns on a lamp. Then he gently pushes me up against the door and kisses me. Again, it’s a slow, soft amazing kiss. The kind of kiss that I feel like he’s kissing my soul.
Oh my gosh. What the heck does that even mean? Kissing my soul? I’m seriously losing it here.
His hands are very appropriately placed around my waist and are not moving.
Move your hands.
Kiss me with your tongue.
Take my shirt off.
Attack me already. Please! I can’t take it anymore. (Neither can I!)
But I don’t say any of that. I just savor each and every slow amazing and tongue free kiss.
Maybe he was born without a tongue, I think for a brief second, but then I realize that I am dumb because he wouldn’t be able to talk if he didn’t, now would he?
Finally he moves his hands up the back of my shirt. He stops kissing me and looks deep into my eyes. I seriously should have drank before I left. Or guzzled a few shots the second I got here. But I had no idea HE would be here!
His looking at me is sorta unnerving, but at the same time, like the kiss, it electrifies me. His face is close to mine, but not so much that he is like blurry to look at. I figure if he can stare at me, then I can stare back. And I take in every curve and angle of his face.
The way his jawline is flexing slightly. How his eyelashes are a dark, dark brown and curl upward. How he has a sexy teeny freckle just to the side of his left temple. How his textbook lips are the exact color of the pale pink roses Tommy gave Mom for their anniversary, and how the the sides of his mouth are turning up, starting to smile at me. He blinks his eyes slowly. When he opens his eyes, I study the emerald green of his irises, how they have little flecks of blue in them and maybe even a little golden around the edges. I feel like time is standing still again. (Has Keatyn described anyone else in such detail? Was this not a CLEAR sign that she LOVED HIM AND HE WAS THE ONE? Love their moments.)
Then he slides his hands up into my hair and leans in to kiss me again. My body is trying to be good, but I can’t stop it from leaning into him. Melding my body to his. I could stay this way forever. He stops kissing me, looks deeply into my eyes again, tells me he loves me.
He didn’t say that.
I just thought that.
Well, I thought his eyes told me that. Shut up! It’s what it felt like. And what the hell is with the going so slow? Does he not want to make out with me? Is he gay? (LOL)
Finally he says, “You should probably go back and check on your friend. Those guys will get her drunk and take advantage of her.”
“We didn’t drink before we came. She can’t be drunk yet, and you promised me a drink.”
“Also, I don’t want people to notice we’ve been gone very long. They’ll think we’re having sex. We don’t want to ruin your reputation.”
“I think maybe you just don’t want to be alone with me. I don’t understand. You act like you’re all into me, but then, we barely kiss.”
I get irritated and frustrated by this. But no way am I going to be the one to like move things along.
And I thought he was a player.
Why isn’t he trying to play me? To use me? To take advantage of me?
I shoulda pretended to be drunk, maybe? (I love this line.)
He doesn’t really say anything to me, just shakes his head and says, “You just don’t get it, do you?”
And I’m thinking, no, I’m obviously not getting it tonight.
“Apparently not.” I say. Then I storm past him, across the hall and back into the party. But I don’t really feel like partying anymore. I want to go home and cry. And what the hell don’t I get??!!! I mean besides a good make out session with the God of all Hotties.
I look around for Katie, find her swigging whiskey and sitting on Tyrese’s lap. They start to make out.
Dawson get up off his chair, practically knocking the girl that was sitting on his lap onto the floor, stalks over toward me, grabs me and pulls me into a kiss. A big sloppy wet kiss. An all sorts of tongue kiss. A kiss I was totally not prepared for and am not enjoying in the least. I pull away from him and run out the door. (Love their horrible first kiss! She should have known from the start it would end badly, just from this one moment! It was so different than her and Aiden’s first kiss.)
Then I sit out in the hall and start to cry a little.
Aiden slides down next to me. “Why are you crying?”
“Because he ruined my lips.” (So freaking sweet.)
And I can’t lie to this boy. “They don’t taste like you anymore. They taste like whiskey and cigarettes. He’s a horrible kisser.”
“He’s drunk and sloppy.”
“Let’s get your friend, and I’ll walk you both home.” He says. He seems like such a gentleman. Or is he wanting to get me back to my room. Sneak in with me? No. We were alone. And he didn’t try anything. I don’t think he likes me.
He just wants me gone.
I guess, he figured it out quick, like he said.
“You don’t have to do that. I can get us home. Plus, I get it. You already figured it out, right?”
“Figured what out?”
“You know. What you were saying about all your girlfriends. I mean, not that I’m like a girlfriend or anything, but like you knew quickly that I shouldn’t be one.” (She’s rambling. Love it.)
“You’re so cute, and you’re making no sense. Come here.”
And I do. Straight to his lips. And get another slow, long, delicious kiss.
Why have you kissed so many boys?
Katie is asleep and snoring lightly. I’m laying in bed. Closing my eyes and reliving my kisses with Aiden.
And I can’t sleep.
So I text my mom, hoping she is still awake.
Me: How did you get Tommy to fall in love with you? You said you knew instantly. Did he?
Mom: He knew it too. I could feel it, it just took him a little longer to figure it out.
Me: How do I make the God of all Hotties fall in love with me?
Mom: I thought you loved Brooklyn.
Me: Mom, you don’t understand. I am in LOVE with him. And all he will do is kiss me! And I’m talking a NO TOUNGE KISS!!! Other boys make out with me, why won’t he?
Mom: Other boys?! Just how many boys have you kissed there?
Me: Uh, like three.
Mom: Keatyn Elizabeth! You don’t want to get a bad reputation on your first week there! Why have you kissed so many boys? Did you get drunk? What kind of school did we send you to?
Me: Calm down. And no. I kissed Dallas the first night. And it was like fun, and he’s sweet, but it’s like a friend thing, a chill thing. Then I kissed Riley. He’s really pretty hot. Sexy. Thought he was a player, but he’s not acting like it so far. Then Aiden kissed me on the cheek and gave me a four leaf clover and it WORKED! I made Varsity soccer AND the dance team! Oh and Gorgeous (Love that she refers to Dawson as Gorgeous.) kissed me too, but he was drunk, so it didn’t count. (Wasn’t a similar conversation had about this in That Wedding? If Keatyn had read it, she’d know that they never do.)
Mom: Dance team? Really? I’m shocked you tried out.
Me: I was too, but I made it, and I’m excited. Back to the hottie.
Mom: The hottie sounds sweet.
Me: But that’s just it. He IS sweet. And he’s supposed to be a player. He had 8 gfs last year. He gets kinda flustered when he’s around me. Players don’t get flustered, do they? And the things he does to me!
Mom: Wait, I thought you said he wasn’t doing anything to you.
Me: I mean like I can barely breathe when he’s around. When he touches me I feel like I’m getting shocked. And tonight, I was at this party and he took me to this empty dorm room. And he DIDN’T attack me! He just gave me these slow, amazing, tender and TOUNGELESS kisses. He looked deep into my eyes and I swear into my soul. (That ought to tell you something, K.)
Mom: Wait. What time is it there? And what were you doing at a party? It’s your second night of school.
Me: Can we PLEASE stick to what is important here? HOW DO I MAKE HIM FALL IN LOVE WITH ME?
Mom: Sounds like maybe he is already.
Me: No! He’s not. He was a total gentlemen. He doesn’t want me. Should I like sneak over to his room and just attack him?
Mom: Sex is not going to make him fall in love with you. (Sound advice from Abby.) It sounds to me like he likes you A LOT and is trying to take it slow. Not screw it up. (I also love how she tells her mom so much and no subject is off-limits. It shows how close they are and their mutual respect for each other.)
Me: OMG!!!!??? You think??!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mom: Yeah. Go to bed!
Saturday, August 27th
You don’t have a bra on.
Clearly missed breakfast. Can’t remember what is supposed to be going on today. Did we miss something already?
I grab my phone.
I have a few texts.
The love of my life <3:
Wait that’s confusing. I have to change that.
Now, that’s better.
Dallas: You up yet, cutie? Heard you had some fun at the party, without Riley 🙂
Brooklyn: Miss you, Keats.
Peyton: Pick up your dance uniform at 2:30. You won’t perform, but are required to be in uniform.
Sex God: You kissed my brother?
First things first.
Me: Your brother kissed me. He was drunk. It was horrible.
Sex God: You didn’t like kissing him?
Me: OMG! NO! And for the record, you are a WAY better kisser.
Sex God: Maybe I should come kiss you now. What are you wearing?
Me: PJ shorts and tank top. Still in bed.
Sex God: Heard that’s what you wore to the party. White tank top with a leopard bra underneath. I was jealous at first, but I already saw that bra 🙂
Me: Yeah, cuz you’re naughty.
Sex God: Naw, cuz I’m good 😉 You’re coming to the football scrimmage, right? Watch me kick some ass?
Me: Of course. What time is it again?
Sex God: 3. Can I come over?
Sex God: I wanna snuggle up with you. (Sure you do, Riley.)
Me: I just woke up. I’m sure I look like shit.
Sex God: Doubtful. Go brush your teeth. I will be there in like 2 minutes.
Me: Make it 10 and if you wanna be really nice, bring us some coffee and muffins.
Sex God: Oh, I’m gonna be very nice…
Me: <3 and no.
I’m not sure what to say to Brooklyn. I really wish I could call Brooklyn and tell him all about whats been going on here. About the guys. Have him give me some more zen advice. But that would be pretty awkward. So I just say, Miss you too.
And I wanna see what Dallas has heard, so I reply.
Me: What’d you hear?
Dallas: Dawson kissed you. Dumped a girl off his lap, walked across the room, and attacked you kind of kiss. (I can so see that scene in my head and would love to see it in a TV show for real.)
Me: Yeah, it was awful. I stopped it as quickly as I could.
Dallas: And what about Aiden?
Me: How do you know all this shit? (I love that Dallas knows everything. It fit his personality, but it wasn’t until I was writing Kiss Me that I asked how he knows. Is it just because he’s easy to talk to? It was then that I decided he was there for more than just an education and was also at Eastbrooke in order to remain safe.)
Dallas: I also know Riley is buying you coffee and muffins as we speak.
Me: You are scaring me. How do you know about Aiden?
Dallas: Heard you kissed. Heard you got mad at him. Heard you were crying in the hall.
Me: He told you??
Dallas: Can’t give up my sources.
Me: DID HE TELL YOU?? YES OR NO??!!!!
Me: He did kiss me, but he has decided he doesn’t really like me.
Dallas: You sure about that?
Me: Yes. He kissed me. It was amazing. But that’s all he did. No hands, no tongues, just a kiss. Well a couple kisses.
Dallas: Hmmm. Maybe he wants to take it slow.
Me: Only people who don’t like you want to take it that slow. But I’m glad I know now. So I won’t get my heart broken.
Dallas: Are you gonna hook up with Riley?
Me: Idk, probably, eventually, someday
Dallas: You gonna hook up with me?
Me: Idk, probably, eventually, someday. (I actually wrote a scene where they did.)
I get up, run to the bathroom, pee and brush my teeth quick, run my hands through my hair, and remove the mascara smudges from underneath my eyes. I’m just finishing when Riley knocks gently on the door. Katelyn is still asleep, so I run over to the door quickly and open it.
And there he is. Looking hot in a bright orange Polo rugby shirt and khaki cargo shorts.
“I think I’m a little underdressed,” I say.
He hands me a tray of coffees and a bag of muffins. I walk over and set them on my nightstand. He follows me, grabs me, falls onto the bed with me, and immediately starts kissing me. Well.
“Hey, I need sustenance here.”
He rolls on top of me, pins my arms above my head, and says, “I need something to sustain me too. God. You don’t have a bra on.”
“Oh shit. I forgot. I’m sorry.”
He breaks out into a wide grin. “Oh, no. No apologies necessary. I like.” He stares at my chest. “A lot.”
“So, I need food, what do you need?”
“You. All of you.”
“You have to feed me first.”
“I want you to beg for it.”
I squint my eyes at him. He’s a shit. But it’s really hot.
“Please, feed me muffins and coffee.” Then I lean up as far as I can and try to kiss him. He keeps my arms pinned down and moves his face back away from me.
“You don’t want to kiss me?”
“Please,” I whisper.
He smiles, leans down and kisses me.
Katelyn’s voice interrupts us, “Not to interrupt, but um, is one of those coffees for me?”
This breaks the spell. A little anyways.
Riley slides off me, gets a blueberry muffin and a coffee and hands it to her. She says, “Hey, I’m gonna take this out to the common room and then shower. I, um, probably won’t be back for at least an hour. See ya. Thanks for the muffin, Riley.”
Riley jumps off the bed the second she walks out the door and locks it.
Then he walks back toward me, tossing his rugby on the floor. He has an extremely tan and buff chest.
He sits down on the edge of my bed and tries to take off my tank top.
I stop him.
“Okay, so here’s the deal. Stuff spreads around here like freaking wildfire. So if we are gonna do stuff. You can’t tell anyone about it.”
“Because I think this stuff is private. Like it’s between you and me. No one else needs to know. Do you agree?”
“Look, people are always going to believe the worst, regardless of what you tell them.
You tell someone we hung out, they will assume we made out, or had sex. Tell them me, you, and Dallas hung out, they’ll assume we had a threesome, despite our protests.
“Less is more. The less you say, the more they will think.”
He ponders this for a second, says, “You’re right, and you seriously need to be wearing less.”
But I don’t let him pull off my tank top just yet. But I’m seriously considering it.
“So do we have a deal?”
“Yeah we do, so what’s it gonna be?” he asks, digging around in the muffin bag. “Blueberry muffin or cinnamon pound cake?”
“Pound cake, please.”
He puts little bites of poundcake in my mouth. I’m opening my mouth, letting him feed me. Letting him stop feeding me to kiss me.
Pretty soon the cake is gone.
And he’s kissing me and running his hands all over me. Still on top of my clothes though. And I don’t know why, but part of me is thinking, what the heck? Why not? I seriously consider undoing his shorts, I sort of graze the top of his shorts, like by the button, with my hand. But just as I am going to pull my hand away because I have decided not to do something like that, he grabs my hand, pushes it up against his stomach.
I think he thought I was going to do that. (Riley + Keatyn? Naw. Riley + Jillian. Hell yeah.)
“I thought about it, I wasn’t going to,” I tell him.
“Oh, you were going to, but we’re not having sex. Yet.”
“I didn’t really want to, but I think you do.”
“Naw, I decided I’m gonna make you wait.”
And I’m both sad and glad he does.
And really, it just makes me want him more.
Why couldn’t the hottie do this?
Shake my pompoms, shake my ass.
Standing at the football scrimmage in a teeny red skirt with yellow and gold glitter stripes down the side. The waist of the skirt looks like football pants, complete with yellow drawstrings. The top of my dance uniform is half a top, going down to barely cover my boobs. It is V-neck, also looks like a modified, sexified football jersey. And the “briefs” we wear under the skirt, are gold glitter thongs, okay they are bigger than thongs but still, they do not cover much up. As in when I dance, you can see my ass cheeks, well part of them anyways. And I practically lived in a bikini, but when you are in a bikini and everyone else is in pads and a full uniform, you feel nakedish. (I had so much fun designing their dance costumes!)
No wonder all the boys are gaga over the dance team. I’m out here practically naked!
Peyton comes to stand next to me. “So I heard you kissed Dawes at the party last night. And my brother.”
“Dawson kissed me, and it was only for a second. I mean I stopped it very quick, but it was awful. Messy, like my Worst Kiss Ever. I heard you dated him. Did he always kiss bad?”
She sighs. “No. He was super drunk. Probably why he’s playing so bad today. He’s very hungover.” She points out at the field, where Dawson is struggling at quarterback. “He’s a good kisser. Amazing at everything. And we did date the past couple of years, but he cheated on me last year, and then lied about it.” (What? No way. Dawson is not a cheater! Which I figured out once he and Keatie were so cute together.)
“I heard he was drunk. Didn’t really know what he was doing.”
“Yeah, and we’d just had a huge fight on top of it. I know I like pushed him over the edge, so it’s partly my fault. I don’t know. Part of me will always love him, but I can’t be with him. I don’t trust him anymore. How do you know all this?”
“Stuff gets around really fast here. Like gossip, rumors. Plus, quiet, cute little Dallas hears EVERYTHING!” (What is with the capital letters? Don’t shout at us, Keatyn.)
“It does. My brother kinda has a thing for you, you know?”
“No. He doesn’t. He kinda did, maybe, like on the ferris wheel and like with the clover, but last night he decided that I’m not it.”
“What do you mean?”
“He told me that’s why he had so many girlfriends last year. When he knew they weren’t right, he’d break up with them. He doesn’t want me. Maybe we’ll be friends though. He’s really nice. And he’s like the most beautiful boy I have ever met, and that’s saying a lot since I grew up around Hollywood.”
“You like him.” She says in a singsong voice, teasing me.
“He doesn’t like me, so I can’t really like him.”
Aiden comes running down the field past me, leaps up and catches a pass thrown from Logan, one of the JV quarterbacks. He was wide open and runs the ball in a few yards for a touchdown. Then he runs right back by me, and says, “Boots, how bout I get a dance for every point I score?” (Points for Dances, Round 1.)
“Uh, sure.” I say and then nervously shake my pompoms.
“We’re supposed to be cheering for the Varsity, Keatyn,” Peyton laughs.
“But they’re all our guys, shouldn’t we cheer for both sides? And you have to cheer for your brother!”
“You know, he’s gonna score a lot of points. I told you, he likes you. And now you owe him six dances. Oh wait.” She watches him drill an extra point through the uprights and says, “Make that seven.” (You can see here why I had to change things to make Whitney be Dawson’s ex and the ultimate Queen Bee. Peyton is too nice.)
I scream, shake my pompoms, shake my ass. It’s a really fun scrimmage.
Because of Dawson’s major hangover, he plays poorly. At one point, he walked behind the bench and threw up on the turf. Coach finally took him out. Peyton assures me he is usually a really good quarterback.
Tyrese plays well, he’s a running back and has this little stutter step before he cuts in a certain direction, that no one can seem to guard. Plus he’s pretty big and hard to knock down. Katelyn has been cheering her heart out. She’s a bit hungover herself. She didn’t take my advice on the only have two drinks thing. Dallas plays defense, linebacker for JV. He has some great tackles and sacked Dawson like four times. And I was a little shocked when Riley came in as the Varsity quarterback, taking over for his brother. Dallas seemed to take it a little easier on him.
And then there’s Aiden. I don’t know how it happened, but Logan and Aiden got into a stride. Aiden caught twelve passes and scored on three of them. He kicked five extra points and two field goals.
Meaning I owe him 29 freaking dances. (You don’t hear much about Logan in this original version, but he became important as Aiden’s best friend. And Maggie and Logan’s backstory added a lot to why Logan didn’t like Keatyn and why he didn’t think Aiden should pursue Keatyn further. He was down on love.)
After the game, I’m standing in a group of dancers, when Aiden comes strolling up, helmet off, hair sexily messed. He even looks beautiful when he’s all sweaty and gross. (Can you so picture this?)
He grins at me.
“So, you scored quite a few points out there. You don’t have to dance with me twenty-nine times. I know you said your dance card was already full.”
He stands really close to me, “No, you said my dance card was full. And now it is. With you. Twenty-nine dances. That pretty much makes you my date.”
“I promised I’d dance with a couple other people.”
“Fine. Dance with them at the start of the dance. I want all twenty-nine in a row. And then I’m going to walk you home, kiss you again.”
Pledge my undying love.
Ask you to marry me.
Have my babies.
Oh, wait. Sorry. There my imagination goes again!
He looks down my barely there dance uniform and says, “I saw you cheering for me. You were excited I scored, weren’t you? You can’t wait to dance with me all night.”
“I was standing next to your sister, I HAD to cheer for you.” I tease.
“See you tonight, Boots.”
I wanna knock his socks off.
In the dance locker room, eating pizza with the girls. Laughing, getting ready for the dance. The dresses I wore the last two days were cute, sweet, fun dresses. I looked a little sexy, but like a good girl. I wore my hair straight the first day, in a pouf last night. Tonight, my dress is different. Tonight Kym, my mom’s stylist, told me I should knock their socks off. So I am wearing a Herve Leger black bandage dress. My mom wore this dress to a premiere in London last year. Kym said it looked killer on me, which is good, and suggested I vamp it up even more with some tough girl shoes. So the dress is sleeveless, has a deep v neckline and a body hugging design that leaves nothing hidden. Every curve of my body is amplified in this dress. And it’s very, ass skimmingly, short. But actually much longer than the dance team skirt I just took off. The shoes are black platform peep-toe Louboutins covered with studs. No jewelry. (We know that Keatyn loves fashion and shopping, but one way I showed her growth in the series was through her clothing. In early books, she tells you about what she is wearing in great detail. In the later books, not so much. Because it wasn’t as important as getting her life back. She also said like a whole lot in the early books. I’m not sure if it was growth or being at Eastbrooke, that was another big change in writing her.)
I’m curling my hair into a riot of big sexy, just got out of bed, but my hair looks amazing, super model curls.
I do my make up simply, with pretty pink lips and blush, but then add dark, smokey eyes.
I think I look pretty damn good.
At least I’m feeling pretty sexy.
Tonight I look like the bad girl.
And that’s good because somehow I have to get through twenty-nice dances with the God of all Hotties.
And I really want to knock his socks off, and maybe a few other articles of clothing as well. (Tee-hee.)
Twenty Nine Songs.
Show up to the 8pm start dance at 8:30 with the dance team. We make a pretty good looking entrance. I’m getting quite a few admiring glances. I’m standing there, looking for Aiden, when Dallas walks right past me, gives me a complete look over, but doesn’t say a word to me.
He turns to face me. Looks at me confused for a second and says, “Holy shit, Kiki! Look at you!! I didn’t even recognize you. My gosh, you look so freaking hot!”
“I think you owe me a dance.”
“Hell yeah, I do.”
He leads me out to the dance floor. Grinds with me. Jumps around crazily. Shoulda known he’d be fun to dance with. I dance a long DJ remix of songs with him. Then another. Finally he says, “I need something to drink.”
We walk back over to a table and grab a couple bottles of water. “Hey, you wanna go to the cave later. Probably you should change first.”
“Maybe. Did you hear I owe Aiden like thirty dances.”
“I heard it was twenty-nine, one for every point he scored.”
“You hear WAY too much.”
“Well, I’m more worried about what I didn’t hear.”
“I didn’t hear what happened with you and Riley this morning. Other than he brought you coffee in bed and planned on not letting you out of bed.”
“Kiki…..seriously. We talked about this. No fibbing.”
“Okay, so some stuff happened, but nothing serious. Okay look, I told Riley he couldn’t talk about what we do because I don’t want it getting around. So if I tell you and it gets around, I will know you told. And if I can’t lie to you, then you have to know when to keep a secret.”
“I can keep secrets. What happened?”
“We made out, a little. He made me beg for food and for him. It was hot. Then he turned me down.”
“Are you shitting me? HE turned YOU down?”
“Yep. Said I have to wait Although I was NOT going to do anything with him. He just thought I wanted to. I’m pretty sure he thinks every girl wants him.
“Good, I think you should wait.”
“Because I think you should do that with me instead, I mean, I PROMISE, I will NOT turn you down.” He laughs. “Seriously. The cave tonight. We’ll chill, have some fun.”
Riley stalks up behind me, grabs me around the waist, turns me to face him. Takes in my outfit. “God damn, baby, you look, um, tough, hot. Fuck me in the bathroom, hot. Speaking of that.” He grins at me. (Love his potty mouth, even though it’s not YA appropriate, technically.)
“I am not going in the bathroom. You had your chance this morning.” Ha. I think that will become our running joke. Him pretending I wanted him, him pretending he turned my down. “Well, sorta. Now you have to just dance with me. Because you can be very certain, someday when you do decide you want me, I’m gonna turn you down flat.”
“Bitch,” he laughs and pulls me out on the dance floor. His dancing is naughty. Plain and simple. Seriously. I think we could get expelled for this. One hand is cupping my ass, he’s grinding into my hips, the other hand is running down my arms, in my hair. Thank goodness, the dance floor is packed by now. And we are in the middle of the pack, surrounded by people doing their own version of the bump and grind. He teases me and pretends like he’s going to kiss me, but then doesn’t. “When did you become such a tease?”
“When I met you.”
“I have to pee.”
“You’re just trying to get me in the bathroom, right?”
I walk off the dance floor, Riley stays out there and starts dancing with a group of girls, already has one grinding her butt against him. And he has his hands all over her.
Jeeze. Isn’t he sorta, kinda supposed to be mine? (Keatyn is just simply overwhelmed with all the hotness at Eastbrooke. And who can blame her?)
And then I think about the boy who IS supposed to be mine tonight. Aiden.
Where is he?
I go pee, make sure my makeup looks okay and head out the door.
As I come out of the bathroom, Dawson grabs my arm, pulls me off to the side. I’m afraid for a moment that he’s gonna try and kiss me. “Peyton knows we kissed.” (Seems so weird to see her name and not Whitney’s.)
“Uh, EVERYONE knows we kissed.”
“I’m sorry, okay. I was pretty drunk. I’m still hungover.”
“You should come with a warning label. Do Not Kiss When Drunk. It was horrible.”
“Sorry. I…. I’m sorry. Okay?”
“So I saw you out there grinding on my brother. What’s up with you two anyways?”
“I want in his pants, and he won’t let me, basically.” And I walk away from Dawson, who is still standing there with his mouth open.
I look around for the god, don’t see him. Grab my purse and see that it is almost ten. So much for my dances. I decide to go find Dallas. Maybe it’s time to get out of this dress, into some sweats and go out to the cave.
I stand there for a minute, looking around, trying to see where he is, when someone comes up from behind me and puts their hands over my eyes. I can tell by the dreamy smell, that it is the God of all Hotties himself.
I turn to face him. And once again, he takes my breath away. He’s wearing a black designer suit that drapes perfectly over every muscle. Underneath is a soft black cotton tee and on his feet, gorgeous black and silver snakeskin cowboy boots. Boots!! (Don’t you love that he was wearing boots?!)
“So you get all your dances you had to do finished?”
“Well, all except the ones with you.”
“Awesome. Come with me.” He takes my hand and leads me out the door.
“I thought you wanted to dance with me?”
“Oh, I do.”
“Then where are we going?”
“I’ve got a little surprise for you.”
I see that he is leading me to his dorm. So last night, I was irritated that he didn’t do anything more than kiss me. Tonight, I’m irritated because I’m pretty sure he wants to do way more than kiss me.
And that kinda pisses me off.
I can’t figure this guy out. At all.
Maybe that’s his rouse. He acts like a nice guy. Like he’s not a player, then a girl thinks, Well yeah, I know he’s a player, but he was soooo sweet to me, I must be different than all those other girls, and then she falls in love with him and then he plays her.
So I try to make conversation. Safe conversation.
“So, you always score so many points?”
“No. Never. Those were for you. I’m trying to impress you. Remember, I asked you to be my date and you said no, so I had to come up with a new way to monopolize you.”
“So you’re gonna monopolize me in your dorm room?”
“Kinda.” He flashes me another blinding, powerful grin, and I just do as he says. He may also have the power of mind control. I’m not sure yet.
We are standing outside his dorm room. “Close your eyes.”
Okay, is it just me, or is this getting just a little freaky? And what the hell does he have in here?
What’s that line, Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
I close my eyes, hear him open the door. He gently guides me in, shuts the door.
“Okay, open your eyes.”
And I do.
And what I see is not what I expected.
The lights are off in his room and on the ceiling he has strung a bunch of little white twinkling lights. He has a bottle of champagne chilling in a bucket of ice, and there are rose petals all over the floor. (I want to cry. I love this.)
But I still don’t know what it means.
It’s a big elaborate seduction scene. I can’t imagine a boy going to this much trouble for anything else. No wonder he got so many girls last year. I mean who wouldn’t fall for all this shit?
Well, except for me. Because I know what he’s trying to do.
And I feel disappointed.
“I don’t get it,” I say. “I thought you wanted to dance with me? Or did you have a uh, different kind of dancing in mind? If you want to have sex with me, at least be honest with me and tell me that’s all you want.”
He looks around, panic on his face. “Shit. That’s not what I want. Oh, that is kinda what it looks like. Crap. I’m sorry. No. Let me start over.”
He walks over, grabs a clear corsage box off his dresser and hands it to me. “This is for you.” It’s a beautiful cascade of deep purple roses. I’ve never even seen roses this color. (Axed this. The first time he gives her flowers comes much later.)
He takes it out of the box, slides it on my wrist, holds out his arms. “All this is not supposed to be a seduction. This is supposed to be me, recreating a dance. I wanted to dance all twenty-nine dances with you all alone. I even have a 29 song playlist on my ipod if you’re ready.” He grins. “They’re kinda all slow songs too. I want to dance slow with you.”
And then I feel amazing again.
Like all is right in the world.
He turns on the music, pulls me into his arms and sways with me. By song four, we are barely moving, but my body is molded up to his again. And once again, we are staring at each other, not saying a word. One of his hands runs lazily up my arm, then across my shoulder, then across my jawline, under my chin. And then finally, across the back of my neck, pulling me toward his lips.
We kiss. Soft, slow gentle. I seriously have never felt anything so intense. How can soft butterflies flitting through the air kisses have so much power over me? (Because you love him!)
I was right, for sure his powers are in his mouth. And he is so using them against me. And I am but a mere mortal. I can’t resist.
“Want some champagne?” he murmurs. “I have chocolate too.”
I don’t want to stop dancing, really don’t want him to let go of me.
“I really don’t want to move from this spot.” I tell him. Told you. I can’t lie to him. What’s wrong with me?
He gives me another soft kiss, “You don’t have to move.”
He does though, pops the bottle, pours it into glasses, hands me one.
He puts his glass up in the classic I’m about to do a toast position, so I don’t take a drink yet. He says, “Now a soft kiss, ‘aye that kiss, I row in endless bliss. Cheers.” (Oh, shit, Aiden. Bad move.)
He takes a drink. But I don’t. I’m standing here frozen.
Like Oh Shit, What Just Happened here frozen.
“What’s wrong?” he asks me, “Do you not want champagne?”
“You just quoted Keats.” I say, still shell shocked.
“Yeah, you knew that, huh? It’s a great quote, right? I read it today and it reminded me of you. Of our kisses. How they make me feel.”
I put my hand up to my face, to the bridge of my nose, run it across my eyebrow. My hand is shaking.
I look down at my champagne. And drain the fricking flute. “Can I have some more, please?”
“Uh, sure.” He pours me some more. I drain that glass too. I’ve never done champagne shooters before, but hey, there’s a first time for everything, right?
“Okay,” he says, taking away my glass. “What’s going on? Why are you downing champagne like it’s a Jaeger bomb?”
He pulls me back into his warm arms. And my mind is replaying my last night with Brooklyn, trying to decide if we had true love, or if this is it. Did I just get some kind of sign? And was it a he quoted you Keats, you are destined to be together sign, or a he quoted you Keats, you should be thinking about Brooklyn and run away from him kind of sign? (In the published version, you got to see her and B together and felt her emotions and the crush and love she had for him. In this version, all you really know is they slept together, and it seems like she’s being a bit overdramatic here. By spending more time with her and B and their summer of love, it makes more sense why she freaks out here.)
He starts swaying against me. And before I can think any more thoughts, he is kissing me. Really, freaking kissing me. The kind of kisses I have been dreaming about.
Oh my. What ever the people who make the gods did, they did this one up right. But then of course, he’s using his mouth on me.
What else would I expect?
Other than a few more, earth stood still, brain shattering, meteor showering moments. (She is so expressive and lyrical when she talks about Aiden. It was so funny to me that people didn’t know they would end up together. HE IS THE ONE!)
His hands are in my hair now. Then he stops kissing me, takes off his suit jacket. He has on just his black T-shirt and his arms are so hotly jacked. I run my hands across his muscles.
“Tell me the quote again.”
“Now a soft kiss, aye that kiss, I row in endless bliss.”
“You’re beautiful. I haven’t told you that yet tonight, have I? How I didn’t even recognize you at first. I just saw this amazing body in a sinful dress and thought, Wow, who is that? Then I looked closer and realized it was you. Your hair is,” he laughs, “well, its looking a little messed up right now, but it looks even sexier. Do you have any idea how sexy you are?”
“No, I don’t. And last night. I thought, I mean I really thought you didn’t like me.”
“Why would you think that?”
“Because we were completely alone in a room and all you did was kiss me. We didn’t even make out!”
“Is that why you cried?”
“Uh, no. I cried cuz Dawson kissed me and it was gross. And my lips felt amazing from kissing you, and then they felt gross and it made me sad.”
“I fixed that though. I kissed you again.”
“Yeah, you did. My lips are feeling a little gross right now.”
“Oh really?” he mutters and kisses me some more. But no matter how much he kisses me, no matter how long he kisses me, it’s like he gave me a love potion, and I can’t get enough. I will never be able to kiss him enough.
“I’m tired of dancing.” he says, and pulls me down on the futon with him. I look over and see the keg of beer is still in his room.
“You always keep a keg in your room?”
“No, well we have to move it all around, so we don’t get caught. But, yeah, usually. Our dorm advisor thinks I’m a good boy. So he never checks my room. Do you want a beer?”
“Actually, yeah. That sounds good.”
He gets up and pours us each a beer.
“So you still haven’t told me about the quote. Why did your face go completely white, when I said it?”
I try to think of a good story, but I can’t come up with anything, so I tell him the truth.
“The guy I dated, hung out with, my best friend, calls me Keats. He also loves any kind of old literature and quoted me Keats a lot. And we had kind of an intense night (Make that, summer.) before I left to come to school. But he told me that I should experience all school has to offer, and that includes high school boys, so here I am.” (Somehow I’m not sure “experiencing” high school boys is what he meant.)
“And you’re in love with him?”
“I love him. We’ve been best friends for three years, but I don’t know if it’s like true love. Like if you even believe in that stuff. Like soul mates and stuff.”
“I believe in that stuff. I told you that. I also told you that’s why I didn’t stay with the girls I dated for very long. I kept thinking it could be something, but then I just couldn’t make it be something, so we broke up. I’ve never done anything like this for a girl before. I’ve never quoted her poetry. You are different, Keatyn.”
There we go, the You Are Different line. Player, player, player.
I giggle. “In other words, I’m weird?”
“Pretty much,” he laughs, and then pulls me back in for more kissing.
I’m in heaven, dreamland, fantasy world, the underworld, Mt……uh what is the mount where the greek gods hung out? I can’t remember, but I think I’m there too.
We make out for days.
At least it felt like it.
But even though we have moved on to making out from just plain amazing kisses. He is still like being very very good. His hands are in my hair, down my back a little, but that’s it. While his mouth is behaving skillfully, his hands are behaving prudishly. And all the guys told me Aiden has great hands. What the hell do they know? Maybe he’s saving them or something.
Then all of a sudden, the ipod blasts out a loud booming rap song.
“Shit, I think my 29 songs are over.” He runs over and turns down the music.
“So, it’s almost curfew. I should probably walk you home.”
We are walking hand in hand and talking.
“You having a party again tonight?”
“Probably. But I may not go. I might just go crash in someone else’s room.”
“Well, they will like the lights.”
“Yeah, I’m thinking the lights might have to stay.”
“Tonight was amazing, really.”
“So the intense night you had, um, does that mean you, uh, slept with him?” (Aiden, don’t be jealous! She’s with you. You’re gonna mess things up!)
“And had you done that with him a lot, like before?”
“Oh, no. It was my first time. First couple of times anyways.”
“So he is special?”
“Well, here we are.” We are standing outside my dorm. He kisses my cheek and says, “See ya later, Boots.” (I love that he doesn’t kiss her in the final version. He pats her on the back. Which becomes a bit of a joke between them.)
And after all the romance, the making out. I still have absolutely no idea where I stand with this guy. Because I’m pretty sure, now he’s mad at me.
I look at my phone.
I have a couple texts from Riley, asking where I am, one from Tyrese, with the party info, and one from Dallas, asking if I will take him to the party tonight. If I got invited.
Which I did.
And although I thought I would go home, lay in my bed and dream about Aiden. Now I’m too confused by his actions. And I am afraid to text Riley. He would probably attack me, and I’m confused enough. I need a mellow boy, one who will chill will me and not make my head hurt. So I text my mellow boy back.
Me: I did get invited to the party, but I’d rather chill. Meet me at the Cave at 1?
Dallas: Will do. And will bring party favors 😉
Me: Just don’t bring Riley, okay?
Dallas: Why, I saw you two getting down on the dance floor, of course after you left he was getting down with pretty much everyone on the dance floor. Some sophomore named, Audrey, in particular.
Me: Who did you dance with?
Dallas: Just a group of people. No one special.
Me: Why am I kinda pissed Riley was dancing with someone else?
Dallas: Weren’t you off dancing with someone else? IN HIS DORM ROOM? (Good point, Dallas.)
Me: Yeah, nothing happened though. I mean we danced, kissed, finally made out a little, but that’s it. Then, well, uggg 🙁 it all went to shit 🙁 Tell you when I see you 🙂
You’re fun to kiss.
I’m laying on a blanket, in the clearing at The Cave. Dallas on one side of me, Dawson on the other.
Yeah, Dawson. As in Gorgeous.
What do they say about strange bedfellows?
Riley, Katie, Tyrese. Peyton, Ace, and Jake are all at the party. Along with some other people. I guess after the dance got them pumped up, chilling at the cave was not something that sounded good to them.
Dawson was sad. When I got here, he was sitting by himself. He looked up at me, and I swear, I might have seen tears. (Ahhh, poor Dawes.)
And I feel bad for him because I know it too. Love sucks.
“Tough day, huh?”
He runs his hand back through his hair and then rubs his hands down his face. “Yeah. Shitty day. Are there a bunch of people coming here tonight?”
“I don’t think so. Only me and Dallas that I know of.”
“I can’t handle being friends with her,” he tells me randomly.
“Yeah, I love her. Standing there watching her dance with Jake tonight. I wanted to alternately kill him, kill her, or kill myself.” (If you are one of my readers who isn’t a teen anymore, this line so sums up the intense feelings you have about life and love at that age. Everything seems so much bigger and more important than it is. I remember crying and begging and pleading for my mom to let me go to this “one party” because it was literally the most important thing ever. She relented. Let me go. Nothing important occurred.)
“She asked me about our kiss last night.”
“No, I told her you were really drunk, that I stopped it, that it was messy and horrible.”
“You’re not exactly cheering me up here.”
“I let her know it meant nothing. That is was nothing. She told me what happened. She also said you had a fight before it, that she pushed you, and it was partly her fault.”
“She said that? She always says it was all my fault.”
“I think maybe she’s realizing in a relationship, it’s never one person’s fault. Just like in Physics. The Newton dude’s law. Like for every action, there is a reaction.”
“That’s pretty freaking deep, dude. And you haven’t even smoked yet, have you?”
“No. I don’t know if I will. I just wanted to come out here and think. You’re not the only one with relationship problems.”
“What you said about my brother earlier, that really true?”
“Sorta. Not really. I don’t think we would have done anything, but I sorta made a little move, and he was teasing me telling me he was making me wait. I can’t even believe I was considering doing what I was considering doing anyways. I’ve known him for three freaking days. I’m an idiot.”
“No, your not. This is all new and exciting. It will get old and boring pretty fast, trust me.”
“So have you tried to get her back?”
“Ye-ah. All the time. She won’t listen to me. Says we are just friends. I can’t be her friend.”
“So you’ve apologized?”
“A million times.”
“What did you apologize for?”
“For hooking up with another girl, what else would I apologize for?”
“Well, she told me today that the hookup wasn’t really the problem.”
“What the f*ck? What do you mean?”
“She said you lied to her about it. That she can’t trust you anymore.”
“I didn’t lie to her when she first asked me. I really didn’t remember!”
“Maybe that’s what you should tell her. Earn back her trust. Also what Aiden said to you the other night, that his sister would never get back together with you because of how you were acting, when you were like pawing my top. You been acting like that a lot lately?”
“We just got back to school!”
“This summer maybe? Last spring?”
“Hmm, yeah maybe. So what am I supposed to do? Go without girls to try and prove something to her?”
“I think maybe that’s exactly what you need to do.”
“Can’t I just buy her some jewelry or something. That was my dad’s suggestion.”
“I don’t think you want to look like you’re buying her, do you?”
“No. I can’t freaking win.”
“What if you could?” (This simple question starts so much.)
“What do you mean?”
“I think your image needs a makeover.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
Dallas crept up on us and whispered, “Hey guys,” and wrapped me in a big hug.
“I love you already, you know that.”
“Hey, I need hugs too.” Dawson said, and Dallas and I jumped on him, hugging him, knocking him to the ground.
Dallas says, “So tonight was good, then went to shit, what happened with Aiden?”
“Yeah, what happened with Aiden?” Dawson asked.
“Well, he took me to his dorm room, opened the door and he had put lights up on the ceiling and had rose petals on the floor, and seriously, I was pissed. Here he had been telling me he wanted to dance with me, made it sounds all romantic, and I walk into this huge seduction scene.”
“So you don’t want to do it with Aiden?” Dallas said.
“Well not yet! Not until I know if he likes me. And we go out and all that and like fall in love or something. Like it’d be a while, for sure! After last night, I thought we were done, then he scored the points for me, and I was hopeful. So we danced, kissed his amazing kisses. But still, no making out. No hands. Nothing. Then he decides to pop the champagne, and he then he does this sweet toast. By fucking Keats.”
“What’s wrong with Keats? Isn’t he the romantic poet dude?” Dawson wondered.
And Dallas was like “Ohhhh, the surfer dude. He calls you Keats, right? You got mad at me and said no one else could call you that.”
“Yeah, plus he always quotes Keats poetry to me. And he did one about nothing becoming real until you experience it and that was right before we had sex. My first time. The night before I came here! Like four days ago!”
Dawson lowered his voice said, “Oh, dude. Bad move, huh? Like mood killer?”
“Ya think? I like froze. Then I slammed two flutes of champagne and tried to chill. He didn’t know. And his quote was sweet, like about bliss and kisses.”
Dallas laughed, nudged me with his elbow. “So THEN did he try to get down and dirty?” (LOL, Dallas.)
“NO!! We kissed, and finally made out a little. But he still like, you know, his hands stayed put.”
“You can kiss me, I promise my hands won’t stay put.” Dallas shot back.
“That goes for me too.” Dawson grinned.
“YOU,” I said, pointing to Dawson, “are done with the random hookups. No kissing. No sex. You are a good boy.”
Dallas rolled out the blanket. “So that sounded okay, why did you say he doesn’t like you?”
“Cuz then he asked about the Keats, and I told him. I said intense, and then he asked if I meant sex when we were walking home, and I said yes, and then he didn’t kiss me goodbye. He acted mad at me. Mad I had sex with a guy have known for three years. BEFORE I even met him. Then he kissed me on the CHEEK and said, See ya later, Boots. So does he like me or hate me?”
“I vote for hate you.”
“Yeah me too.”
“You guys suck.”
Dallas said with a naughty little voice, “Well we don’t, but hey, you feel like sucking something, we certainly won’t stop you.” (Love his funny, dirty mind.)
I punched him. (Also, please ignore the fact that this switches back from past to present tense. Bad author.)
“Okay, here, we need this.” Dallas lit up his little party favor, and we got a little baked.
We all laid on Dallas’s blanket, looking up at the night sky. There are lots of stars out. It’s gorgeous.
It’s also getting chilly, and pretty soon we are all three wrapped up in the blanket.
“So back to making over your image. I mean think about it. You know like in Hollywood if someone gets caught cheating on their wife, or gets a DUI, or goes to rehab, they look bad? People think they are doing bad thing, their movies maybe don’t sell, they can’t get corporate sponsors, advertising dollars, that kind of thing. There are publicists who specialize in making over your image. Like hook you up with a charity event, get you out and about photographed doing good, raising money, happy pics of you your happy family. But you have to do what I say.”
“We’ll see, depends what you want me to do. I don’t wanna look lame.” Dawson tells me.
“What do you think your reputation is at school? How do people view you?”
“I’m the quarterback and dated the hottest girl. I’m like cool.”
“Maybe that’s what you used to be. I mean, I know I’ve only been here a few days, but I see you as a guy who is a dick to his brother, a player, and a partier. And a quarterback who doesn’t give a shit.”
“Dallas, you’ve known me longer. What do you think?”
“I’d have to agree with her dude. Sorry.”
“Well shit.” (Poor Dawson. Let’s pour some truth salt on his wounds and rub them in.)
“So are you a good quarterback?” I ask.
“Yeah. I was last year.”
“Okay, so here’s the other thing you’ve got going for you. You’re hot. Like besides the God of all Hotties, you are the most gorgeous guy here. Amazing body. That’s the first thing I noticed about you.”
“But if I can’t be with other girls, what good is it gonna do me?”
“Dude, I don’t think she said you couldn’t be with any girls, you just can’t be with every girl. He could have a girlfriend right? Just not a bunch of hookups?”
“Right, Dallas! And oh, that would make her so jealous. Hookups, kissing freshman, oogling bras, that just makes her know she was right. You get, or seem, slightly serious about a girl, that might upset her a little.”
“And you need to be nicer to Riley.”
“Damn, Dallas, you’re good. He’s right. Peyton and Aiden are tight. You’re a jerk to your brother. You need him to be your best friend. And he idolizes you, seriously, you should be nice to him.”
“Yeah, I have been kinda a douche.”
“And how bout this social committee that Peyton is on? Are you on it?”
“No, but I could get on if I wanted.”
“Do it. You’re gonna have to work closely with her to plan some events, I think.”
“You also need to get back to your confident self. I see you moping around with her. Embrace your new friendship. Start confiding in her, maybe about a girl you might like, or a project. Maybe you do a social event that would raise money for a charity.”
“I want her to go to homecoming with me.”
“Then that’s our goal. You’ll be a good brother, a good quarterback, a nice guy, a leader. New and improved and most importantly, trustworthy.”
“Dude, why do you like her so much? Like what is it about her?” Dallas asks.
“Her hair always smells like strawberries, she has the softest skin, she has great legs and is absolutely gorgeous. She’s a good person too, like pretty nice to most people.”
“And we’re gonna get her back, man.”
“You’re so cute, and sweet.” I tell Dawson. “I like this new you already.”
“Maybe you can be my new girlfriend?”
“Uh, I think I have enough complications as it is. But, I could flirt with you. But I couldn’t kiss you. Peyton says you’re a good kisser, but my experience was awful. Sorry, but it was.”
“Maybe I need to fix that.”
Then he kisses me. A slow sweet kiss.
And I can’t help it. I kissed him back a little. Even though I knew I shouldn’t. (Oh, Keats…let’s see. How many boys have we kissed now in four days? Brooklyn, Riley, Dallas, Aiden, Dawson. Is it bad that I want to be Keatyn?)
“So? And I know you didn’t want to kiss me, but I can’t have you going around telling everyone how awful I am. THAT will not be good for my image.”
“Right.” I giggle. “And you’re right, it wasn’t awful.” And I’m thinking there’s something about Dawson that makes him sexier than Riley. It’s his humbleness, his thoughtfulness, his sweetness. I can see why Peyton liked him.
“Hey, I’m gonna head in. Don’t stay out too late.”
He no more than gets the words out of his mouth, walks into the trees, and Dallas is kissing me. Nice, fun, easy kisses.
“You’re fun to kiss.” I tell him.
“And you are a mess.” (Dallas hitting the nail on the head.)
“I know, but I think you like that about me.”
He laughs, “Yeah, you’re right.”